With yourself

Shower mindfully

Have you ever realised that you are in the shower but barely present? I have. I realised that I would soap myself, shampoo and condition my hair, and sometimes even brush teeth while the water is still running. Completely absent from the present moment.

Here is a quick guide if you tend to shower unconsciously too.

Tap on.

Wash.

Tap off.

Soap body.

Tap on.

Rinse off soap.

Tap off.

Use the on & off method above and continue with your shower ritual. Shampoo, condition, brush, floss, oil pull, etc. Sounds very basic and simple. Even obvious. Try it. It is very calming and you would realise that you tend to linger in the shower longer than necessary because of your mind.

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With others, With yourself

Brené Brown’s Parenting Manifesto

This isn’t just for parents though. The manifesto can be tweaked to suit all kinds of close relationships.

It is a reminder that being vulnerable and authentic in our close relationships is fundamental to forming true connections. We can build others up by building ourselves up. We can teach our loved one to love themselves by being a walking example of self-love and respect. We can stop trying to take away the pain of others but instead, be there as their pillar to allow them to work through their feelings. It teaches me to stop expecting perfection from anyone in any aspect of life (including myself). It nudges me to be patient, kind, compassionate and understanding towards my loved ones so as to make life a little easier for them in an already chaotic world. 

Above all else, it speaks to me, to start being the vessel of love and light for others, by having the courage to start working on myself from inside out. Noone ever say that the process is going to be easy, straight-forward, instant, or shame-free. How liberating, empowering and scary is that realisation?

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Image is available for free download @ www.brenebrown.com.

With food, With yourself

Eating to escape

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I own the terrible feelings that I feel in my body, mind and soul and I let them be. Somehow, allowing them to surface, instead of keeping them repressed, makes them go away. When I allow the murky, overwhelming and unpleasant feelings the room to make themselves known, I have learnt that overtime, they become weaker and have less influence on me.

Sometimes I eat when I am full, because I feel an emptiness in my soul that needs to be filled. And the moment the bag of chips finishes, I feel the well-acquainted feeling of having let myself down, even though I knew better. That is what hurts. The fact that I knew better.

But this is not a post about regrets, it is a post about progression.

I have learnt that feeling through the undesirable emotions is an important step in putting food into my body with love. My body is my vessel, and if I don’t treat it right, I wouldn’t be able to live the life I am meant to live. More importantly, I will not be able to share the love I am here to share and spread. Because I have learnt that before I try to be loving towards others, I need to love and respect myself – both the intuition of the formless and the health of the physical form.

 

With yourself

You are beautiful!

The Lilypad

I was walking in a mall recently and this roadshow sales lady came up to me and told me to try her skin care products and that it would brighten my skin. That was her opening line!

A lot of thing came up after that encounter with her. I was reminded of all the times that I was bullied in school because of my dark complexion. I was called names, left out of activities (once some girls said that they wouldn’t come for a game of basketball if I were there and my friend actually came up to me and asked if I still wanted to be play in the game because all of them wouldn’t turn up if I went, I still went anyway. Only my two friends and I were there. I was 12 by the way), scratched, turned away from, kids would wipe their hands if they touched me and even refused to touch my worksheets.

These happened in the diverse, multi-racial and multi-cultural Singapore. And I believe it happens everywhere around the world.

I was dwelling in the negativity in my head for a while and then had some sudden insights that helped me to snap out of it.

  1. If this issue is still affecting me after so many years, it means I still have work to do in this area. I need to release and open myself up to love.
  2. I created a perception about the situation in my head which probably was not true anyway.

I just came back from a 4-day mindfulness retreat and remember a monastic telling us that the scent and beauty of a rose does not change or diminish just because everyone has an opinion about it. How very apt.

I am worthy of love. I am beautiful. My body is the vessel of love, kindness and joy. And I respect my vessel that allows me to touch the lives of so many people. I will make it my mission to lead people to the realisation that love, kindness and compassion are our innate similarities which makes all of our external differences so insignificant.

Love to all! ❤

 

 

 

With food, With yourself

Enough by Geneen Roth

“Since I dont allow myself to savour, what I already have, I always want more.” – Geneen Roth

I have spent my whole life thinking about decluttering and it is an ongoing battle for me. The truth is, I own more things than I need. And as a first step to simplifying my room (and life), I decided a few months back to stop buying more things. I only get things that I absolutely need and nothing more. If I were to purchase something, I tell myself to let something else go to charity. And this has helped me in many ways.

This video by Geneen Roth encourages me to appreciate what I have and remind myself that I am enough.

I am enough. I have enough.

Collectively, we have enough and we are enough. We don’t need another “thing” to complete us.